The Law Of The Garbage Truck
The Law of the Garbage Truck
One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport.
we were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car
jumped out of a parking space right in front of us.
My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other
car by just inches! The driver of the other car whipped his
head around and started yelling at us.
My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean
he was really friendly. So I asked, “Why did you just do that? This
guy almost ruined your car and could have sent us to the
hospital!”
This is when my taxi driver taught me what I
now call, “The Law of the Garbage Truck.” He explained
that many people are like garbage trucks.
They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger,
and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they
need a place to dump it and sometimes they’ll dump it on
you. Don’t take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish
them well, and move on.
Don’t take their garbage and spread it to other people at work,
at home, or on the streets. The bottom line is that successful
people do not let garbage trucks take over their day.
Life’s too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so …
Love the people who treat you right. Pray for the ones who don’t.
Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how
you take it!
Have a blessed, garbage-free day!
(This was forwarded from a friend)
Contract Renewal for 2009
"Renewal of friendship Contract" After serious and cautious consideration…..
your contract of friendship has been renewed for the new year 2009 .
It was a very hard decision to make. So try to be more friendlier and caring next year. I am giving you another chance so please sign this contract ASAP.
Don’t mess it up.
My Wish For You
My Wish for You in 2009
May peace break into your house and may thieves come to steal your debts.
May 2009 be the best year of your life!!!
Merry Christmas
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Bush Shoe Game
Since the shoe-throwing incident at US President, the Internet has been flooded by online games in which users can throw shoes at Bush, or avoid them...
During Bush's recent visit to Iraq, Iraqi journalist Muntadar al-Zeidi hurled his shoes at the American President during a news conference in Baghdad. Since then, at least 10 games were released in less than a week.
One of the first games released is the Bush Shoe Game created by Mind360, an Israeli company that develops scientifically based brain training games.
This is really a fun game and measures your time. the object of the game is to duck when the shoe is thrown.
& nbsp; &n bsp; &nb sp;
Frog Time
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One of the most emailed photos on yahoo
RNPS IMAGES OF THE YEAR 2008 Oui the frog sits on a miniature motorcycle in the eastern beach town of Pattaya January 10, 2008. Oui's owner says Oui loves playing with human toys and posing for photographs.REUTERS/Sukree Sukplang (THAILAND)
Help Those In Need
Click on the yellow button at The Hunger Site and give a
cup of food to the hungry at no cost to you.
The great thing about the site is that you can help provide free mammograms for women in need by clicking on the Breast Cancer button.
The Child Health Button will provide health care for needy children around the globe.
The Literacy buttons gives free books.
The Rain Forest Button is dedicated to preserving the rain forest.
Finally we come to the Animal Health button, this will help the many animals in shelters. the housing crisis has caused a great increase in the animals left at shelter. your click will provide food.
All of this does not cost us any money but it does take time.
Please Take The Time.
My Birthday Invite
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You are invited to come and celebrate my
Birthday Tuesday, December 23rd.
Fun, Food and Music
All gifts will be appreciated but money will be accepted if you insist.
Why God Made Mom's
Enjoy the answers given by elementary school age children to the following
questions:
Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger
parts.
What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in
the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use
string. I think.
Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.
What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on
beer? Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to
chores.
Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a
goofball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
What's the difference between moms and dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home, and dads just got to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause
that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of
plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of
that.
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it
and not me
"Metrosexual Man"
Metrosexual man is a new term for me an I thought it had to do with homosexuality, I was dead wrong.
After doing some research on it, this is what I found.
The typical metrosexual is a young man with money to spend, living in or within easy reach of a metropolis — because that's where all the best shops, clubs, gyms and hairdressers are. He might be officially gay, straight or bisexual, but this is utterly immaterial because he has clearly taken himself as his own love object and pleasure as his sexual preference. Particular professions, such as modeling, waiting tables, media, pop music and, nowadays, sport, seem to attract them but, truth be told, like male vanity products and herpes, they're pretty much everywhere.
—Mark Simpson was the first to use the word metrosexual.
Take the test and find out if you are a metrosexual.
Forgiveness
Sometimes the hardest thing to say is "I'm sorry", to admit that we have hurt someone. The only thing that can be harder is to forgive those who have hurt us. The story is told of a father and his teenage son who lived in Spain. Over the years, their relationship had become strained. In fact, the list of hurts grew so long that the son ran away from home. The father searched for him, but after months of failure, made one last desperate effort by putting an ad in the local newspaper of Madrid. "Dear Paco, meet me in front of the newspaper office at noon. All is forgiven. I love you. Your Father." The next day at noon, in front of the newspaper office, eight hundred Pacos showed up. The reality is that we all need forgiveness and we all must learn how to forgive.
Worlds Youngest Mother
A Soldiers Christmas
TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS,
HE LIVED ALL ALONE,
IN A ONE BEDROOM HOUSE MADE OF
PLASTER AND STONE.
I HAD COME DOWN THE CHIMNEY
WITH PRESENTS TO GIVE,
AND TO SEE JUST WHO
IN THIS HOME DID LIVE.
I LOOKED ALL ABOUT,
A STRANGE SIGHT I DID SEE,
NO TINSEL, NO PRESENTS,
NOT EVEN A TREE.
NO STOCKING BY MANTLE,
JUST BOOTS FILLED WITH SAND,
ON THE WALL HUNG PICTURES
OF FAR DISTANT LANDS.
WITH MEDALS AND BADGES,
AWARDS OF ALL KINDS,
A SOBER THOUGHT
CAME THROUGH MY MIND.
FOR THIS HOUSE WAS DIFFERENT,
IT WAS DARK AND DREARY,
I FOUND THE HOME OF A SOLDIER,
ONCE I COULD SEE CLEARLY.
THE SOLDIER LAY SLEEPING,
SILENT, ALONE,
CURLED UP ON THE FLOOR
IN THIS ONE BEDROOM HOME.
THE FACE WAS SO GENTLE,
THE ROOM IN SUCH DISORDER,
NOT HOW I PICTURED
A UNITED STATES SOLDIER.
WAS THIS THE HERO
OF WHOM I'D JUST READ?
CURLED UP ON A PONCHO,
THE FLOOR FOR A BED?
I REALIZED THE FAMILIES
THAT I SAW THIS NIGHT,
OWED THEIR LIVES TO THESE SOLDIERS
WHO WERE WILLING TO FIGHT.
SOON ROUND THE WORLD,
THE CHILDREN WOULD PLAY,
AND GROWNUPS WOULD CELEBRATE
A BRIGHT CHRISTMAS DAY.
THEY ALL ENJOYED FREEDOM
EACH MONTH OF THE YEAR,
BECAUSE OF THE SOLDIERS,
LIKE THE ONE LYING HERE.
I COULDN'T HELP WONDER
HOW MANY LAY ALONE,
ON A COLD CHRISTMAS EVE
IN A LAND FAR FROM HOME.
THE VERY THOUGHT
BROUGHT A TEAR TO MY EYE,
I DROPPED TO MY KNEES
AND STARTED TO CRY.
THE SOLDIER AWAKENED
AND I HEARD A ROUGH VOICE,
"SANTA DON'T CRY,
THIS LIFE IS MY CHOICE;
I FIGHT FOR FREEDOM,
I DON'T ASK FOR MORE,
MY LIFE IS MY GOD,
MY COUNTRY, MY CORPS."
THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER
AND DRIFTED TO SLEEP,
I COULDN'T CONTROL IT,
I CONTINUED TO WEEP.
I KEPT WATCH FOR HOURS,
SO SILENT AND STILL
AND WE BOTH SHIVERED
FROM THE COLD NIGHT'S CHILL.
I DIDN'T WANT TO LEAVE
ON THAT COLD, DARK, NIGHT,
THIS GUARDIAN OF HONOR
SO WILLING TO FIGHT.
THEN THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER,
WITH A VOICE SOFT AND PURE,
WHISPERED, "CARRY ON SANTA,
IT'S CHRISTMAS DAY, ALL IS SECURE."
ONE LOOK AT MY WATCH,
AND I KNEW HE WAS RIGHT.
"MERRY CHRISTMAS MY FRIEND,
AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT."
This poem was written by a Marine stationed in Okinawa Japan. The
following is his request. I think it is reasonable.....
PLEASE. Would you do me the kind favor of sending this to as many people as you can? Christmas will be coming soon and some credit is due to our U.S. service men and women for our being able to celebrate these festivities.
Let's try in this small way to pay a tiny bit of what we owe. Make people stop and think of our heroes, living and dead, who sacrificed themselves for us. Please, do your small part to plant this small seed.
Mature Folks
Two elderly women were eating breakfast in a restaurant one morning.
Ethel noticed something funny about Mabel's ear and she said, '"Mabel, do you know you've got a suppository in your left ear?"
Mabel answered, "I have a suppository in my ear?" She pulled it out and stared at it.
Then she said, "Ethel, I'm glad you saw this thing. Now I think I know where to find my hearing aid."
______
When the husband finally died his wife put the usual death notice in the paper, but added that he died of gonorrhea.
No sooner were the papers delivered when a friend of the family phoned and complained bitterly, "You know very well that he died of diarrhea, not gonorrhea." Replied the widow, "I nursed him night and day so of course I know he died of diarrhea, but I thought it would be better for posterity to remember him as a great lover rather than the big shit he always was."
______
An elderly couple were on a cruise and it was really stormy.
They were standing at the stern of the ship watching the moon, when a wave came up and washed the old woman overboard.
They searched for days and couldn't find her, so the captain sent the old man back to shore with the promise that he would notify him as soon as they found something.
Three weeks went by and finally the old man got a fax from the boat. It read: "Sir, sorry to inform you, we found your wife dead at the bottom of the ocean. We hauled her up to the deck and attached to her butt was an oyster and in it was a pearl worth $50,000. please advise." The old man faxed back: "Send me the pearl and re-bait the trap."
______
A funeral service is being held for a woman who has just passed away. At the end of the service, the pall bearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket. They hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive! She lives for ten more years, and then dies. Once again, a ceremony is held, and at the end of it, the pall bearers are again carrying out the casket. As they carry the casket towards the door, the husband cries out, "Watch that wall!"_____
When I went to lunch today, I noticed an old lady sitting on a park bench sobbing her eyes out. I stopped and asked her what was wrong. She said, "I have a 22 year old husband at home. He makes love to me every morning and then gets up and makes me pancakes, sausage, fresh fruit and freshly ground coffee."
I said, "Well, then why are you crying?" She said, "He makes me homemade soup for lunch and my favourite brownies and then makes love to me for half the afternoon. I said, "Well, why are you crying?" She said, "For dinner he makes me a gourmet meal with wine and my favourite dessert and then makes love to me until 2:00 a.m." I said, "Well, why in the world would you be crying?"
She said, "I can't remember where I live!"
______
Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards.
One day they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, "Now don't get mad at me. I know we've been friends for a long time, but I just can't think of your name! I've thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is." Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said, "How soon do you need to know?"
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THE SENILITY PRAYER
Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.
Now, I think you're supposed to send this to 5 or 6, maybe 10.
Oh hell, send it to a bunch of your friends if you can remember who they are.
Then something is supposed to happen . . . I think . . . . Chuckle, Chuckle, Chuckle! d:-)
Retarded Grandparents
After Christmas, a teacher asked her young pupils how they spent their holiday away from school. One child wrote the following :
We always used to spend the holidays with grandma and grandpa. They used to live in a big brick house in Wisconsin, but grandpa got retarded and they moved to Florida. Now they live in a tin box and have rocks painted green to look like grass.
They ride around on their bicycles and wear name tags because they don't know who they are anymore. They go to a building called a wreck center, but they must have got it fixed because it is all ok now, they do exercise there, but they don't do them very well. There is a swimming pool too, but they all jump up and down in it with hats on. At their gate, there is a doll house with a little old man sitting in it. He watches all day so nobody can escape. Sometimes they sneak out, and go cruising in their golf carts.
Nobody there cooks, they just eat out. And they eat the same thing every night - early birds. Some of the people can't get out past the man in the doll house. The ones who do get out bring food back to the wrecked center for pot luck.
My grandma says that my grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and says I should work hard so I can be retarded someday too. When I earn my retardment, I want to be the one in the doll house. Then I will let people out so they can visit their grandchildren.
Missing Bloggers
"Drama About Xmas Lights"
They are up now and for some reason she will not talk to me.
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"No More Bratz Dolls"
If you have a little girl in the house, you know what a Bratz doll is. Little girl loved the new pouty mouth doll that looked so different fromthe barbie dolls.
They apparently took to many sales away from the mattel corporation that makes Barbie dolls. They took the bratz people to court and won.
Read the story here:
"Sum Up Your Life In 6 Words"
There is a book, "Not Quite What I was Planning" and celebrities and non celebrities are asked to to sum up their life in 6 words.
Joan Rivers said "Liers, hysterectomy didn't improve sex life!"
If you had to sum your life up in 6 words, what would you say?
"When Will You Die?
Time is slowing ticking away and we know that we all have have to die someday, the question is when?
This is where the Death Clock comes in. I go to this site once a year and answer all of the questions and the death clock gives me the day that I am going to die, down to the seconds I have left. Some people think that this is morbid and the man that started this site regularly get death threats.
Remeber that this is all in fun and nobody knows for sure when someone is going to die.
My personal day of death is Wednesday, March 6th, 2019.
If you are not afraid you can check your on day at: