Cleaning House

11.20.09 (11:50 pm)   [edit]

 

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I asked the Lord to tell me
Why my house is such a mess.
He asked if I'd been 'computering',
And I had to answer 'yes.'

He told me to get off my fanny
And tidy up the house.
And so I started cleaning up...
The smudges off my mouse.

I wiped and shined the topside.
That really did the trick....
I was just admiring my work.

I didn't mean to 'click.'

But click, I did, and oops I found
A real absorbing site.
That I got SO way into it.
I was into it all night.

Nothing's changed except my mouse
It's very, very shiny.
I guess my house will stay a mess....
While I sit here on my hiney.

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A Tip That Can Save Lives

11.20.09 (10:20 am)   [edit]

Pass along to your daughters, family members, & friends.

 

You no longer need to keep your .45 or AK-47 sitting out

on the coffee table...a can of wasp spray will do!
  

Never would have thought it !!! Wasp Spray.
 
I have a friend who is a receptionist in a church in a high risk

area who was concerned about someone coming into the
office on Monday to rob them when they were counting the

collection.  She asked the local police department about using

pepper spray and they recommended to her that she get a can

of wasp spray instead. The wasp spray, they told her, can shoot

up to twenty feet away and is a lot more accurate, while with the

pepper spray they have to get too close to you and could overpower

you. The wasp spray temporarily blinds an attacker until they get to

the hospital for an antidote. She keeps a can on her desk in the office

and it doesn't attract attention from people like a can of pepper spray

would. She also keeps one nearby at home for home protection..
You could also keep it in your car and it's perfectly legal. Thought
this was interesting and might be of use...

Recipe

11.20.09 (2:30 am)   [edit]

 

 

Ben & Jerry's Giant Chocolate Chip Cookies

1/2 cup Butter, room temperature
1/4 cup Granulated sugar
1/3 cup Brown sugar
1 Large egg
1/2 teas Vanilla extract
1 cup (+ 2 teas) All Purpose Flour
1/2 teas Salt
1/2 teas Baking Soda
1 cup Semisweet Chocolate Chips
1/2 cup Coarsely Chopped Walnuts


1. Preheat the oven to 350F.

2. Beat the butter and both sugars in a large mixing bowl until light
and fluffy. Add the egg and vanilla extract and mix well.

3. Mix the flour, salt, and baking soda in another bowl. Add the dry
ingredients to the batter and mix until well blended. Stir in the
chocolate chips and walnuts.

4. Drop the dough by small scoops 2 to 3 inches apart on an ungreased
cookie sheet. Flatten each scoop with the back of a spoon to about 3
inches in diameter.

5. Bake until the centers are still slightly soft to the touch, 11 to
14 minutes. Let cool on the cookie sheet for 5 minutes, then transfer
to racks to cool completely.

 

WHY

11.18.09 (11:03 pm)   [edit]
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are almost dead?


Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they already know
there is not enough money?


Why does someone
believe you when you say there are four billion stars;
but have to check when you say the paint is still wet?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?


Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?


Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?


If people evolved from apes,
why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?


Is there ever a day that mattresses
are not on sale?


Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes
that something new to eat will have materialized?


Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?


Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?


How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?


Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling
off the table you always manage to knock something else over?


In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer
when we complained about the heat?


Why is it you never hear father-in-law jokes?


The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.


Thoughts

11.17.09 (1:55 am)   [edit]

If shampoo comes in so many colors, why is the lather on your head always white?


 

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?


 

Why do birds bob their heads when they walk?


 

When lightning strikes the ocean why don't all the fish die?


 

If money is the root of all evil then how come churches ask for it?


 

Do fish ever get thirsty?


 

Why can't we sneeze with our eyes open?


 

If ignorance is bliss, why arn't more people happy?

Snakes & Ladders Game 105

11.15.09 (5:45 pm)   [edit]

edit]

Thanks to everyone that continue to play snakes an ladders, we had a total of 175 comments in game 1, A total of 75 comments in game 2 and 85 in game 3. In game 4 we had 112 comments, in Game 5 we had 97 comments, in game 6 we had a total of 104 comments. In game seven we have 85 comments and in game 8 we have 95, In game 9 we have 94 comments, Game 10 we have 102 comments,Game 11 we have 105 comments. In Game 12 we have 103 comments and in game 13 we have 75. Game 14 had 88 comments, Game 15 has 90 comments, In Game 16 we have 91 comments,
 

In Game 17 we have 106 comments,In Game 18 we have 101 comments and in Game 19 we have set a new record with 155 comments.In Game 20 we have 138 comments. In Game 21 we had 115 comments and in game 22 we have 113 comments, In game 23 we have 118 comments, In game 24 we have 129 comments, In game 25 we have 138 comments, In Game 26 we have 168 comments, In Game 27 we have 161 comments In game 28 we had 163 comments, In game 29 we had 169 comments, In game 30 we had 149 and in game 31 we have 174 comments, In game 32 we have 122 comments, in game 33 we had 120 comments, In game 34 we have 138 comments, In game 35 we had 130 comments, In game 36 we had 130 comments,In game 37 we had 119 comments, In game 38 we had 121 comments, In game 39 we had 127, In game 40 we have 117 comments, In game 41 we have 102 comments, In game 42 we had 166 comments, In game 43 we have 162 comments , In game 44 we have 144 comments, In game 45 we had 113 comments, In game 46 we have 115 comments , In game 47 we have 111 comments, In game 48 we have 118 comments, In game 49 we have 114 commrnts, In game 50 we have 108 comments, In game 51 we have 118 comments, In game 52 we have 106 comments, In game 53 we have 115, In game 54 we had 112 comments, In game 55 we had 128 comments, In game 56 we had 123 comments, In game 57 we had 132 comments, In game 58 we had 121 comments, In game 59 we had 106, In game 60 we have 107 comments,

In game 61 we have 104 comments,In game 62 we had 109 comments, IN Game 63 we had 88 comments,In game 64 we had 101 comments,In game 65 we had 118 comments, In game 66 we had 119 comments, In game 67 we had 88 comments,In Game 68 we had 130 comments, In Game 69 we had 122 comments, In game 70 we had 108 comments, In game 71 we had 105 comments, in game 72 we had 64 comments, In game 73 we had 124 comments, In game 74 we had 103 comments, In game 75 we had 95 comments,In game 76 we had 103 comments, In game 77 we had 90 comments, In game 78 we have 110 commentsn in game79 we have 104 comments,

In game 80 we have 137,

I game 81 we have 107 comments,In game 82 we have 105 comments, In Game 83 we have 105 comments, In game 84 we had 98 comments, In game 85 we had 86 comments, In game 86 we had 100 comments, In game 87 we had 90 comments,In game 88 we had 102 comments, In game 89 we had 84 comments, In game 90 we had 91 comments, In game 91 we had 78, In game 92 we had 99 comments, In game 93 we had 82 comments, In game 94 we had 94 comments, In game 95 we had 114 comments, In game 96 we had 81 comments, In game 97 we had 72 comments, In game98 we had 61 comments, in game 99 we had 80 comments, in game 100 we 80 comments, In game 101 we had 70 comments, in game 102 we had 61 comments, In Game 103 we had 71 comments, In game 104 we had 76 comments so& nbsp;let 's start Game 105 so that we don't have to scroll down so far.

Thanks to all that continue to play. I  want to thank Coni who continues to play and always keep me inspired.

AuntConi is in the Number one position as most active player and Barnabus is in second place, followed by OS and Kram in 3rd place.Hope PG will be back soon.  We want to thank Tampi, Mimi, and Lostin in 4th position. Thanks Surrogate,Sebastian, Engg, SZ, ink,Nefri and ggirl for dropping in also to add to the fun. Welcome to Swanktrend, Willey, Kinghavoc and hei. Chrisflea, nakedperson, bipolarexoress , vitamin and PastorDave, We want to thank cyrix,pcbiologist and kgurl  for joining us. Welcome to tampi, dattebaka, raj and Pretensions and BlackCherry. Welcome to our newest player this week is rajkumarpb. I want to thank namm and alaskawildflower s for joining in.

Make a sentence from the last word used.


GirlFriends

11.14.09 (5:40 pm)   [edit]

Subject:
Size: 6 KB
The New Motto for 2010!! Start it early!!!
>
> A Poem About Our Girlfriends
> Someone will always be prettier.
> Someone will always be smarter.
> Some of their houses will be bigger.
> Some will drive a better car.
> Their children will do better in school.
> And their husband will fix more things around the house.
> So let it go, and love you and your circumstances
> Think about it!
> The prettiest woman in the world can have hell in her heart.
> The most highly favored woman on your job may
> be unable to have children.
> The richest woman you know, she's got the car,
> the house, the clothes~ might be lonely.
> And the word says, 'If I have not Love, I am nothing.'
> So, again, love you. Love who you are.
> Look in the mirror in the morning and smile and say, 'I am too Blessed
> to be Stressed and too Anointed, to be Disappointed!'
> 'Winners make things happen~~ Losers let things happen.'
> Be 'Blessed' Ladies and pass this on to encourage another woman.
> 'To the world you might be one person, to me you are special!
>

"The Month Before Christmas"

11.14.09 (5:19 pm)   [edit]

Twas the month before Christmas*
*When all through our land,*
*Not a Christian was praying*
*Nor taking a stand.*
*See the PC Police had taken away,*
*The reason for Christmas - no one could say.*
*The children were told by their schools not to sing,*
*About Shepherds and Wise Men and Angels and things.*
*It might hurt people's feelings, the teachers would say*
* December 25th is just a ' Holiday '.*
*Yet the shoppers were ready with cash, checks and credit*
*Pushing folks down to the floor just to get it!*
*CDs from Madonna, an X BOX, an I-pod*
*Something was changing, something quite odd! *
*Retailers promoted Ramadan and Kwanzaa*
*In hopes to sell books by Franken & Fonda.*
*As Targets were hanging their trees upside down*
* At Lowe's the word Christmas - was no where to be found.*
*At K-Mart and Staples and Penny's and Sears*
*You won't hear the word Christmas; it won't touch your ears.*
*Inclusive, sensitive, Di-ver-si-ty*
*Are words that were used to intimidate me.*
*Now Daschle, Now Darden, Now Sharpton, Wolf Blitzen*
*On Boxer, on Rather, on Kerry, on Clinton !*
*At the top of the Senate, there arose such a clatter*
*To eliminate Jesus, in all public matter.*
*And we spoke not a word, as they took away our faith*
* Forbidden to speak of salvation and grace*
*The true Gift of Christmas was exchanged and discarded*
*The reason for the season, stopped before it started.*
*So as you celebrate 'Winter Break' under your 'Dream Tree'*
*Sipping your Starbucks, listen to me.*
*Choose your words carefully, choose what you say*
*Shout MERRY CHRISTMAS ,
not Happy Holiday !*
Please, all Christians join together and
wish everyone you meet during the
holidays a
MERRY CHRISTMAS
Christ is ¡The Reason¢ for the Christ-mas Season!

Another Good Idea

11.06.09 (11:16 am)   [edit]

When you are faced with unemployment and can't find a job, what do you do?

He came up with the idea of advertising a company's business on a T-shirt that he
wears for a dollar a day and then he use places like twitter to promote the company.

For his human billboard service, he charges the "face value" of the day so January 1 costs $1, while December 31 costs $365.

  It adds up to $66,795 a year if he sells out every day, which he did this year. He also sells monthly sponsorships for $1,500, adding another $18,000 to his income.

  He walk around, take photos, wear the shirt all day ... I blog about those photos, I put 'em up on Twitter.

"He made about $83,000 this year."

This is another example of, If there is a will there is a way.

 

 

Never Give Up

11.06.09 (1:29 am)   [edit]
I remember reading last year about the woman in S. Korea that took the written exam
for a drivers license 950 times without passing.

Finally she passed the test.That is what I call perseverance I think that I
 would have given up out of embarrassment long ago if I had failed it
that many times.

With near-daily attempts since April 2005  and spending more

than 5 million won ($4,200) in application fees she passed.

She needed to score the minimum 60 out of a possible 100 points

needed to get behind the wheel for a driving test.

She finally passed the written exam with a score of 60 on Wednesday

Let's wish her luck because now she must pass a driving test to get her license.

 She needs the license for her vegetable-selling business.

Now that is a real never give up attitude.

'Buzzard Baptist"

11.05.09 (2:15 am)   [edit]
MsStar39 posted less than a minute ago | views: 1 | Tags: lifex
 I hate going to funerals unless it is a family member or close friend,. I am a Baptist but the term “buzzard Baptist” is new to me.  It is someone who identifies as a member of the Baptist faith, but only attends funerals not regular religious services

. Some members of many other religious denominations could also be considered “buzzards,” but Baptists are particularly famous for it.

A typical buzzard Baptist chooses only to attend funerals to mark the passing of community members.

Funerals are an important part of their life. Funerals  tend to draw out more members of the community, allowing people to connect with each other, discuss community issues, and catch up on missed news and events. For a buzzard Baptist, being present at a funeral may also be a mark of respect to the deceased.

The term is also sometimes used to describe people who only show up at church events which are likely to include food, a reference to the food-seeking habits of the buzzard. This type of buzzard Baptist may be reluctant to provide or cook food for church events, but takes delight in eating it, and may also take these events as a chance to meet up with other people in the community.

I think that the buzzard Baptist is just a very lonely person,

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It's Up To You

11.04.09 (12:51 am)   [edit]
One song can spark a moment,
One flower can wake the dream
One tree can start a forest,
One bird can herald spring

One smile begins a friendship
One handclasp lifts a soul
One star can guide a ship at sea
One word can frame the goal

One vote can change a nation
One sunbeam lights a room
One candle wipes out darkness
One laugh will conquer gloom

One step must start each journey
One word must start each prayer
One hope will raise our spirits
One touch can show you care

One voice can speak with wisdom
One heart can know what's true
One life can make the difference
You see, IT'S UP TO YOU!!

Husband Of The Year

11.02.09 (12:42 am)   [edit]

Husband of the Year Awards

The honorable mention goes to: 

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The  United Kingdom 

followed closely by... 


The   United States of America  


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and then... 


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Poland  


 

Ever notice how all of women's problems start with MEN? 

MENtal illness

MENstrual cramps 

MENtal breakdown 

MENopause 

GUYnecologist 

AND 

When we have REAL trouble, it's a.. HISterectomy. 

Send this to all the women you know to brighten their day. 

Send this to all the men just to annoy them....

Angels

11.02.09 (12:19 am)   [edit]

May angels rest beside your door,
May you hear their voices sing.
May you feel their loving care for you,
May you hear their peace bells ring.
May angels always care for you,
And not let you trip and fall,
May they bear you up on angel's wings,
May they keep you standing tall.
May they whisper wisdom in your ear,
May they touch you when you need,
May they remove from you each trace of fear,
May they keep you from feeling greed.
May they fill you with their presence,
May they show you love untold,
May they always stand beside you
And make you ever bold.
May they teach you what you need to know
About life here and here-after.
May they fill you always with their love
And give you the gift of laughter

Unknown
Angels are all around us, most of us know this.
Some are too cynical or busy to notice.
Some think they just have wings and fly.
but others don't even question why.
They look like you and me. They all have a purpose.
They are only here to guide us and serve us.
How many times have we said,"That was close!"
and went on to feel depressed and morose?
We never even thought of how lucky we are
to have these angels provide us with care.
So next time you see the beggar on the street
remember to greet him and be real sweet
For it just might be a test from God
to see how loving you'll be to this sot.
So get in your car or catch the bus
But please don't forget whose watching over us.
Thank them and cherish them and give them the praise
and you will be blessed the rest of your days
Cindy Mock
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